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January: The world won’t end. You haven’t bought all your dream shoes, so logically, the end can’t be near yet.
February: A busy, busy month in which you feel overburdened with your workload. At the end of the month you’ll realize that you forgot all about Singles Awareness Day and will be happy.
March: Unexpected winfall will be yours this year: your dream job, a small lotto win, a scholarship, or an unknown inheritance will be your fortune.
April: Instead of throwing yourself a party, you will spend your birthday doing random things you wouldn’t normally do. The usual tears will be replaced with ice cream at the end of the day.
May: Fashion palettes will be dominated by pastels (lilac, robin’s egg blue, mint green), but shoes will compensate by being extra extravagant.
June: The word “bars” will be replaced by the word “books” in your vocabulary. You’ll happily spend every Friday night in with your new pass time, with far fewer bad choices as a result. Unless you run into Charles Dickens, at which point you will take up drinking again.
July: Disappointment awaits at the movies this year; apparently the world really did end with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt. 2.
August: Lady Gaga will walk on nails; do not attempt to copy her fashion statements, as the consequences could be catastrophic for mere mortals.
September: If you're in school, you’ll stay in school, and if you’re not you’ll consider going, but will ultimately stay where you are. This is not a year for academic changes.
October: Crayons are back and so are the 90s; let your inner child shine!
November: Unexpected calamity when you miss-predict the weather, and your favourite pair of blue suede shoes are ruined. Don’t mess with Canadian Winter!
December: You’ll pick up a literary classic from the library, and actually read the whole thing. Mostly because you don’t want to venture outside for fear of sudden weather attacks, and you’ve already watched all your movies twice.